The birthday gift

It was my birthday... yesterday? Is it still today? I dunno anymore. I'm confused. I went with them to the bar; the hottest club in the area because it's the ONLY one in the area. Sad isn't it? We had dinner there so we wouldn't have to pay the cover later and I wouldn't get carded. Thomas was going to meet us. All that was fine.  But then I just wasn't feeling well. I felt so sick and woozy. I guess it was too much celebrating.  There was this girl in the ladies' room who asked if I was okay.  I told her to get Shelly or Thomas. They came to get me and carried me... to the car? I must have been SO wasted. Happy Birthday to me. ugh. But that was a long time ago and it's still really dark. I'm scared. I didn't think I drank that much. Maybe it was the crab cake? Stupid seafood. Never again I swear. My head is beginning to hurt; really spinning.  maybe if I just close my eyes and sleep...


This is insane. Where the Hell are they? This isn't funny anymore.  I'm a good sport but I don't understand why they left me here..for so long. We went to the car. We talked. Well, wait... that isn't right. They kept telling me to STOP talking. They told me to shut up. They ... were mad. at. me. Yelling. Why? What did I do? It was MY birthday? Thomas gave me a drink and said to finish it quick, we had to go. I didn't want to leave but Shelly said she was tired anyway. Whew that drink was strong. They said happy birthday and then I started... oh my God... to feel sick... That's crazy talk. He's my sister's boyfriend. She's my sister and best friend. They would carry me through thick and thin.


But where are they? Oooo wait! I hear them. I hear someone. I am moving. What? Why am I moving? Am I in a trunk?  My arms ache and my lungs feel hot. I'm being pulled up? It's darker than pitch and where did that smell come from? Oh Good Lord it's AWFUL! I want to be sick. Inside my mind there is this little laugh. Insanity knocking? I want to pop up and yell surprise. I hope they have something for me to drink. I'm so thirsty. Yes. I want a drink. Ohhh I can feel me moving up. This will be such a relief to get out of here. I am jittery. tired of being in here...wherever here is. I want to hear what they are saying...

"Just leave her. Let her go."

"Why can't you just help me. This is all your fault anyway."

"MY fault?"

" You are the one who likes "little girls" you sick pig."

"You are the one who offered up your own sister."


"You killed her. I thought you just wanted some sick sexual thing..."

"That sounds so much nicer."

"Shut your disgusting mouth and pull her up here."

"Leave her. She is carrying enough weight in the bag to pull her to the bottom. She'll stay there."

"I CAN'T leave her here. It's gross and wet and cold and..."


"Shelly, she's dead. She doesn't know any of that."


"Pull. Her. UP."

"You're such a bitch."


"Do it or I'll tell."

"You won't."


"Yes I will."

"No Shelly. You won't. This is true."

They talking stopped. Why did it stop? Did I hear that right? I'm dead? I am DEAD? I'm thinking so I can't be dead. I want to see but it's too dark in here. Weight. I'm weighted down. I'm drowning? I drowned? Oh God Shelly. What have you done? I'm straining to hear..some one's coming. Oh Shelly hurry up and pull me up. Talk to me Shelly! TELL ME I'M OKAY

"Why are you shouting?"

"What? Shelly?"

"Why are you shouting at me?"

"Because Shelly...you and Thomas... you drugged me and then God knows what happened and now I'm in a BAG or something and...."

"Wait. How do you know this?"


"I JUST HEARD YOU!"


"What?"

"I was waiting for you to pull me up and tell me "haha funny joke... and then it got quiet and.."


"Oh No."

"What's oh no. don't say oh no. that's not good Shelly."

"You're dead."


"You can hear me. We're talking aren't we? Then if I'M dead and you're talking to me, Shelly..."


"Shush your mouth."

"What do we do now?"

"I'm thinking."

"You can't. You're dead."

"SHUT IT! ~ We can yell real loud and kick and scream. Kick up some water and someone will see us or hear us and ..."

"Great idea if they are mediums. We're dead."


"Stop saying that."

"Well, Shelly, you DID say you were going to tell sooooo you kinda set yourself up for this. He had to kill you, Don't you EVER watch crime shows?"

"Oh so it's all MY fault?"


"Let me think...yes. It falls squarely on you this time Sis. Let me ask three things: Have I been gone long?"

"About a week."

"WEEK? And  you wanted to MOVE me? Okay okay...DID you tell anyone?"

"No, but I did keep a journal and it's all there. Someone has to find it though."

"Please don't tell me it's hidden somewhere."

"No. It's on my bed."

"Okay. Okay good. I don't think you've been gone that long so we might be luck~"

"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"


"Stop yelling. Forever is closer than you think. Yes! Someone's coming!"


"HERE! WE'RE OVER HERE!"

"Shelly?"

"Why won't you HELP me get us out of here?"

"I dunno either because I'm lazy or we're dead."

"Are you going to be a downer all your life?"

"Yes until I die Shelly. Thanks to you."


"You better shut up."

"Why? You gonna kill me?"

"Oooo we're moving! Ow! hey! Those are some big ass hooks!"

"Shut up. You're moving."

"What's that smell?"

"One or both of us. I'm guessing we are pretty -"

"HOOOOOOWEEEEE! Lookee here what we snagged! Garbage!"

"I beg your pardon Mister! I am NOT..."

"You are Shelly. You were lovely once but now you're gross. Dead."

"I hate you."

"Unzip it Hank."

"HANK?! WE were rescued by a HANK?"

"No Shelly, our bodies were discovered by Hank."

"Oh Jesus."

"Who said that?"

"Shelly... I'm the only one who can hear you. Hank can't hear us."

"Walt. WALT. Call somebody. We got bodies here. Nasty stank old bodies. Lookin pretty wasted...."

"Think we'll get him?"

"Shelly, we can't do anything anymore but yeah I think we might have an influence on Thomas's life yet."

"Let's go haunt him."

"Shelly...c'mon, no. We'll just get up and go find something or some angel to point us to..."

"We'll do it just for a little while until he goes insane."

"What? no. Shelly I think we lose our ticket to Heaven for that."

"Vengeance sayeth the Lord.."

"Cheeks. Turn em."

"I can't they're gone."

"What? Shut up how do you know?"

"I just floated up here ...wait til they unzip your..."

"Whoa.....that's me?"

"bag."

"Wow."

"Yeah, sorry. Not your best side"

"Who did that? Did you do that to me Shelly? Cut me up like that?"

"No. Thomas."


"Are you lying?"

"NO! I would never..."

"Pardon me for the cynical laugh inserted here..."

"You're such a bitch."


"Yeah, ever since you got me killed, I've been carrying this chip on my ..well carrying this chip where my shoulder USED to be."


"We could still haunt him."


"Where is he?"


"Who?"

"Who do you think you idiot?"

"I didn't say that."


"Well it wasn't Hank or Walt."

"Hello?"

"Hello."


"I can't see."

"You;re new here too? Ah. Give it a minute or a month we don't know for sure."

"Don't talk to strangers. You could get hurt."

"Worse than dead?"

"Who's dead."


"We are."

"Who's we?"

"Okay let's play the Micky Mouse club and sound off. Who's here in the graveyard today.... ME!"

"SHELLYYYYY"

"Thomas."

"WHAT did you say your name was"

"Thomas."

"What are you doing here?"

"They found you and your sister. They brought me in for questioning. I was going to jail. so I killed myself."

"Oh MAAAAAN we were going to HAUNT you."

"No we weren't Shelly."

"YES yes we were! We were SO looking forward to driving you insane."

"You already did that you nagging bit..."

"ENOUGH. I can't listen to you anymore. I'm going to go away and don't follow me."

"We can't. We can't see you."

"Oh. Okay. Well let's stick together but not talk."

"at all?"


"Well for a while."

"How long?"

"Hey that's not fair! I just got here."

"TOO baaaad. You pedophile."

"Hey don't be mean."

"Because you're fragile?"

"Well I think we should be quiet."

"And why is that baby sister?"

"because you ruined my birthday. Think of it as the gift you owe me."

......

"Is it over?"

"What? The quiet game?"

"Yeah and your birthday. I'm tired of hearing about it."

"Oh yeah. It's over. WAY over."


"Does anyone want to play cards?"

"Really Thomas? Cards?"


"Go fish?"

"You're sick."

"Got any sevens?"


"Uh No but I've snake eyes."


And so this is my eternity. My nagging sister, her pedophilic boyfriend and me. Drink up and join me for my birthday, won't you?








I've been marinating this one for a long time. I've reworked it a dozen times at least. I enjoy the dark humor and though choppy, the bantering conversation.  I needed to work on it anyway. Perfect? No but, I like it nonetheless.  I researched it from a murder case from the 80's. Very warped indeed. I hope I at least brought a simple smile to your face.  It's been so long since we've been able to sit together. Busy hasn't been the word for it.  I hope you are all well. Thanks for the fun email and chats. I've missed all of you here and am glad to be back. Well, I hope so.


Come again soon. I enjoy even the smallest amount of time with you. Have a good day.