Thursday

Long ago, a lifetime to be exact; I barely remember being ushered out the door to the sound of a screeching baby and thick shouting.  The scar from my branding still itched down deep in my skin.  My old man was swearing; slurred dark promises of violence and hate spewed from his gaping hateful mouth.  Why? some people are just broken I guess. I've tried to shut the door on those memories; preferring to call them nightmares and pushing them all too eagerly to the back of my mind to collect dust and be forgotten eventually. That day has yet to meet me.


My forever family as they became known loved me; taught me gentleness, kindness and laughter.  I knew what happiness was and that it didn't come with a price.  I grew into a confident satisfied young man.  I had a wonderful future ahead of me where I would help those less fortunate. I was compelled to do so. The scar on my arm made sure of that. I wanted no one to experience those dreams of mine.


She sat in the park a lot; a dirty sweater wrapped around her hunched shoulders rocking back and forth often muttering to herself.  I guess she was known as the village idiot; Haley.  She rarely spoke to people; instead shrinking from their words like they were weapons themselves.  I had never known her to be anything else but an eccentric street person who suffered from mental disorders. This is what my education told me with indifference, but she weighed on my mind unlike other cases I studied. I began to inquire about her.  Rumors stemmed from her being done wrong by her momma's man, to being witness to a murder, and even a savant. I became inexplicably obsessed with her, following her, sitting with her to push her for conversation. I just knew I could reach her. More selfishly, I felt I HAD to.


Slowly the ice melted and she began to speak; softly and one word answers.  Our first conversations were choppy and abrupt, but I had been given encouragement so I pursued tirelessly.  We began to walk together, eat together and after months, I heard her laugh. I saw her smile.  It was an incredible victory, leaving me impressed with my talents and insight.  She became my only patient.  Our friendship grew and strengthened. She was as warm as the sunny days we strolled in.  Sometimes she wrapped her arm through mine and listened as I told her funny stories or related things from my day or my philosophies. 


It was a Thursday. We had walked  down through town, wandering to the old Davies' farm; the town's junkyard dog. He was a mean old bastard that after finally stepping over the line, had been shot as he staggered up his walk.  Nobody really seemed too concerned with finding the guilty party.  The way I heard it, most thought a great service had been done for the community.


She froze and stared at the house; cocking her head as if it was speaking to her.  The warped structure glared at her from the over growth. Tears began to well up and spill over.  I didn't understand. I asked her over and over if she was hurt.  She took off running and throwing rocks she snatched from the road.  Grunts and pants accompanied her wild pitches. A guttural scream tore at her throat as she crumpled to the ground in front of the dilapidated shack.  She sat broken and sobbing.  I raced up to catch her, cradling her in my arms.  Together we huddled as she told me a horrific, ugly story of abuse I could only dream of. I kissed her hair and tried to soothe her.

"Those are nightmares. They will go away Haley..."

She clung to me as the years of pain fell out into my lap. I draped my jacket around her and pulled her closer in my arms. Suddenly she grabbed at my wrist and twisted it harshly.  I winced but permitted her to see my scar.  She wailed and cupped my face kissing me.


"You. It was you."


I was confused by her words. "What?"


She pulled her sleeve back to reveal a scar identical to my own.  The nightmares flooded my head, clouded my eyes with tears of recognition and treacherous memory. I sank next to her, shaking.


We sobbed together in the dirt in front of our father's house; my sister and I.